F*ck idolization
"F*ck idolization."
Notes on idolization, harm, & alternatives
Idolization is dehumanizing. You’re trapped on a pedestal you never asked for or wanted. & the only place to go, the only escape, is down. You’ll inevitably fall because you are held to impossible standards of perfection that guarantee your eventual exile.
You’re the projection of a fantasy (&/also a wound).
You’re disposable because you’re not an actual person who gets to fail & be messy & grow.
When we idolize others, we are robbed of the chance to build genuine, authentic, & caring relationships with the folks in their community. Parasocial relationships based on idolization aren’t reciprocal or real but merely transactional fantasies based on projections.
Idolizing others is saying our fantasy of who someone should be is more important to us than who someone actually is.
Idolization isolates us from one another, creating false hierarchies that prevent true community building & real relationships.
How can we move away from this harmful dynamic that’s prevalent in our communities & towards something generative, supportive, & sustainable? Here are some of my proposals:
💖 We can be intentional about why & how we are showing up for each other.
🧡 We can devote ourselves to working on loving ourselves & owning our power .
💛 We can stop comparing ourselves to others & when we notice ourselves engaging in competition culture. We can be curious about why & what it being brought up for us.
💚 We can celebrate each other, collaborate with one another, & co-create a community of care. We’re interdependent & stronger when we support & care for each other as a collective.
💙 We can support each other in ways that honor our capacity & boundaries so our care work is sustainable.
💜 We can engage in boundary work to strengthen our skills & ability to know what we want (& what we don’t) & be able to clearly communicate that.
Flat-lay of 9 copies of "Not Your Idol", a zine by Karina Hagelin.
"XOXO, Karina".
