Survivor solidarity 101: 15+ tips on how to support survivors | Healing is the Best Revenge episode #20 transcript
Survivor solidarity 101: 15+ tips on how to support survivors
Healing is the Best Revenge episode #20 transcript
Welcome to Healing is the Best Revenge, a podcast for survivors and the folks who love us, where we discuss the politics of survivorship, healing, and self plus community care. This is a space where we honor the messy and complex realities of healing from trauma, rejecting pedestals and perfectionism along the way.
Hi, I’m your host, Karina Hagelin. I’m a survivor with complex post-traumatic stress disorder AKA C-PTSD and, I get it. I’m here to offer affirmations, pep talks, encouragement, support, and conversations about being in the messy murky middle of healing from trauma. Wherever you’re at in your journey, I believe in you. And I believe you. Welcome to Healing is the Best Revenge, sweet friend.
Hi sweet friend, it’s Karina. Welcome to the 20th episode of Healing is the Best Revenge!
If you hear my space heater, that’s because it’s cold and snowy here in upstate New York. As you may know, this is a messy DIY podcast that I record using just my phone, with a team of one AKA me.
I’m feeling really proud of myself for how I’ve been coping lately. Things have been tough - just like, you know, the nightmares, the flashbacks, the intrusive thoughts, the isolation, just all of it - and yet I’ve found myself reaching for healthy, supportive, and sustainable coping tools and techniques rather than those that are more destructive, harmful, and maladaptive. I’ve been doing things like reaching out and calling a friend, cuddling with my cats, taking time to rest, making sure I’m drinking enough water and eating regularly, all the things that are so important for our wellbeing and/also that can be so difficult for so many of us.
When I recorded the last episode, I was getting ready to teach a webinar on trauma-informed librarianship to a group of over 100 librarians and library workers. That was a few weeks ago and it was such a great experience. These workshops really help me remember why I do the work I do. I love being able to share resources, information, and skills to help folks in libraries better support survivors, including themselves. I want them to have the tools they need to co-create communities of care and foster cultures of healing within their libraries.
I also made a new zine last week, the latest issue of my perzine which is also titled “Healing is the Best Revenge.” A perzine is a personal zine and this is one of the most vulnerable zines I’ve created in a long time. Issue #3 centers themes of self-love, radical vulnerability, survivor solidarity, healing, creativity, trauma recovery, survivorship, and more. It’s a gorgeous, colorful, bright, bold, and inspiring 24-page zine. I’ll link to it in the show notes if you’re interested in checking it out.
So, that’s my lil personal update for you!
Today’s episode is short and sweet, as usual. We’re going to be talking about how to show up for survivors in meaningful and practical ways. I’m excited to share some tips from Healing is the Best Revenge #3 on survivor solidarity 101.
So without further ado, here are 15+ tips for supporting survivors in your life and community:
Believe survivors. This is the bare minimum and should be should be the starting point of support, rather than the end of it.
Ask us what we need; trust us when we tell you. What we need might not be what you would need or what you assume we might ask for.
Use your social capital, connections, & whatever you have to help us access the resources we need to survive.
Learn about peer support; you can even become a certified peer support specialist at no cost online.
Offer us choices; respect our self-determination.
Practice boundary work. You need to get clear on your capacity & what you are / aren’t available for or able to offer. I highly recommend reading the book Boundaries & Protection by Pixie Lighthorse. It’s a really short and accessible but impactful read.
Check in with us. Ask us how we’re doing. Hold space for us as you’re able to.
Learn more about how systemic oppression & violence, such as white supremacy, ableism, heterosexism, misogyny, & so on, impact survivors of sexual violence.
Talk with other people about your efforts to disrupt rape culture. Share information & resources. Organize together.
When you witness victim-blaming & shaming, interrupt it / say + do something / speak up.
Learn about DARVO, which stands for deny, attack, and reverse victim & offender, a way in which abusers avoid accountability & continue to terrorize their victims.
Attend workshops & skillshares on topics like radical mental health first aid, bystander intervention, harm reduction, & naloxone administration.
Do something & do it imperfectly. Divest from perfectionism & believing you need to “save” or “fix” We don’t need to be fixed nor do we need saviors; what we need is accomplices.
Learn from survivors. Consume art and content created by survivors. Read zines and books and blog posts written by survivors. And it’s important to me to emphasize by survivors, I don’t mean just white cis women survivors, I mean Black and Indigenous survivors and survivors of color; queer and trans survivors; survivors of all genders; and disabled survivors. Like any other community, we aren’t a monolith. Survivorship is an expansive lived experience that literally every community is impacted by.
Continue to learn about movements, practices, & histories of mutual aid, trauma stewardship, collective/community care, harm reduction, transformative justice, peer support, & disability justice. Be inspired by these histories and learn from these movements and the brilliant work of fellow activists and organizers.
Finally; collaborate and co-create with community.
That’s all I have for today. I hope some of these tips resonated with you and were helpful.
Before I go, I want ask for your help in getting this podcast to more folks who need it.
I’d love it if you could share a screenshot of this podcast to Instagram and tag me in it, subscribe to or follow this show, leave me a five star review or rating, and/or share this show with a loved one. I really want this podcast to reach more people who need it. Thanks for your support!
Okay, sweet friend. As always, I believe you and I’ll talk to you soon. Bye for now!
