You're doing the best you can & that's good enough | Healing is the Best Revenge episode #15 transcript

Is it easier &/or more accessible for you to read podcast episodes? I’ve got you! I transcribe every episode of Healing is the Best Revenge. Here’s episode #15: You’re doing the best you can & that’s good enough.

Welcome to Healing is the Best Revenge, a podcast for survivors and the folks who love us, to discuss the politics of survivorship, healing, and community care. This is a space where honor the messy and complex realities of healing from trauma, rejecting pedestals and perfectionism along the way.

Hi, I’m Karina Hagelin and I’m a survivor with C-PTSD AKA complex post-traumatic stress disorder. I get it, like really get it, and I’m here to offer affirmations, pep talks, encouragement, support, and some super real talk about being in the messy murky middle of healing from trauma.

Now, a note from this show’s sponsor: Yours truly! Have you checked out my shop? I create cute, colorful zines, stickers, and affirmation prints centered around radical self-love, healing from trauma, vulnerability, friendships as resistance, and moving from surviving to thriving.

Today, I want to recommend my Affirmations for Survivors #3 which is a mini-zine. It’s bright, uplifting, and inspiring, filled with words of support and encouragement for survivors of abuse, trauma, and violence. To check Affirmations for Survivors #3 and/or any of my other awesome products out, head over to karinahagelin.etsy.com or simply click the link in the show notes.

A friend and comrade said they would really like to hear me talk more about my personal experiences as a survivor who is healing. They said it might be helpful for folks listening to the podcast - or at least it would be helpful for them. So going forward, I’m going to try to start each episode with a little personal update.

Hi sweet friend, Karina here.

I haven’t been doing super great, honestly. My traumaversary celebration was incredible. It was really cool to celebrate with peers for the first time. I got to share about how and why my traumaversary celebration was born, which is something I talk about in earlier episodes of this podcast, I was able to do a reading of my Affirmations for Survivors zine, which I printed copies of for everyone’s goodie bags, and just like spend that afternoon hanging out, chatting, and crafting with other survivors. That was really supportive and good.

In the aftermath, I’ve felt really alone and crazy. A few nights ago, I got into a fight with a family member who I called because I was really struggling. They were like, “Why hasn’t your therapist helped you get over this? You’re letting your rapist ruin your life.” I hung up on him because I have boundaries and I didn’t have the capacity to explain, during a crisis, mind you, that you never get over C-PTSD. That that isn’t my therapist’s role in my healing process; her role is to support me in getting THROUGH this because I won’t ever be over it; I won’t ever get over it. That’s the opposite of C-PTSD or PTSD; you wish desperately that you could forget about what happened, that you could move on with your life, but you can’t, because your bodymind won’t let you. And that’s not your fault.

My mom reminded me that if you don’t have C-PTSD or PTSD or closely support a loved one with it, you don’t “get” it. You don’t get how something that seems little & silly to YOU can trigger flashbacks, panic attacks, dissociation, ideation, the whole 9 yards for a survivor. Anyways, that’s me today.

Today’s episode is short and sweet, as usual. I want to share a mini affirmation pep talk with you today. I wrote this for myself and I think you might find it helpful too.

You’re doing the best you can and that’s good enough. That’s all you can do. Your best will look different any and every given day. If your capacity isn’t the same, don’t blame yourself. There will be days when you can’t do all the things you want to do. There will be days where you can’t accomplish ANY of the things you want to do. There will be days in between. It’s frustrating and it’s also okay. You’re still doing a great job. You’re doing so much better than you know. I’m proud of you, sweet friend. Keep going.

Okay, that’s all I’ve got for you today but before I go, if you’d like to receive notes on radical self-love, healing, & affirmations, you can find a link to subscribe to my newsletter in the show notes. I’d love to have you on the list!

Until next time, sweet friend - and as always, I believe you.